Dear Readers -
Apologies for dropping the ball here on the blog the past few weeks. Between wrapping up shooting on my new film and prepping and planning for this year's Cinema Eye Honors, I've been procrastinating my return to somewhat regular blogging.
Here's a piece I started writing as I was en route to Branson, Missouri just after Christmas. I'll be posting a couple more looks back at the year we just concluded in the coming days/weeks. Pardon the delay.
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There’s a story to what happened to me this decade
and it starts in the spring of the year 2000. I was then an Executive Producer at a production company that
specialized in music videos, working with a bunch of talented filmmakers,
routinely awarded budgets of $350K to make a 3 ½ minute clip that would
– hopefully for the band, the label and their hangers-on – be awarded a coveted
slot on the Carson Daly-hosted "Total Request Live".
By the spring we’d surfed this wave for almost a year
and I was starting to feel restless.
More and more of my own creative ideas were being poured into the work
that was coming out of our company, but the execution of these ideas – and the
ownership of same – fell, quite naturally, to the director.
I remember sitting in the color correct of one
particular video, a video whose concept I had proposed (and one that would
later become such a hit on said MTV countdown program that it would help launch
the band and the director’s career) and feeling like I had well and truly
reached the end of my ability to stand in the shadows.
Simultaneously, there was a very real sense that the
status quo in that industry could not sustain itself. MTV was continually cutting back on the number of videos it
was playing and the labels were under attack from digital downloads. And how could labels keep spending that
kind of money on bands with little hope of recouping the costs of such extravagant
vanity videos?
Just prior to this – at the end of the previous
decade – I started to direct my own projects – a friend’s music video here, a
public service announcement there, and finally, a short film. And by the end of the year 2000, there
was a merger.
My short was out on the festival circuit. I felt – for the first time – not like
an Executive Producer (which was a job I loved and, if I do say so myself,
was pretty good at) but like a filmmaker.
I remember flying to London to oversee the shoot a video in the fall of
2000 and writing “Filmmaker” on the occupation line of my landing card and
being strangely, wonderfully proud of this new designation.
By that point I had already, mentally, turned my back
on music videos. For a decade I’d
worked on more than 100 – respected indie bands and big pop artists – but now I
was increasingly ready to go my own way.
And within three months, I’d be in New York shooting
footage for what would become GIGANTIC, my first documentary feature.
The how and the why of GIGANTIC’s birth is less
important than the fact that the arrival of this decade – one that has been
castigated and bemoaned for its acts of terror, war, political combat and
natural decay – signaled a significant shift in my life.
My documentary decade.
I couldn’t have known as I was running around New
York with my Sony PD-150 following Johns Flansburgh and Linnell in the spring
of 2001 what would happen in the decade that followed.
I could not have imagined KURT COBAIN ABOUT A SON or
CONVENTION.
I never dreamed that I would take it all so
seriously, so personally, so occasionally obsessively.
I fell into documentary almost by chance and – in some kind of Faustian bargain – documentary has run away with me.
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